I had a tough, tough time getting to sleep last night. My body started out still, but ended up tossing and turning. It was the life I was attempting to live as my head lay on that pillow. It wasn't still. It was moving along at light speed.
I was thinking about:
-the wedding plans that need to be made between now and a March 13 wedding day.
-relationship stuff between me and people.
-relationship stuff between my kids and people.
-how dirty my house is and how much it needs cleaning.
-how sweet our time over Christmas was.
-how hard our time over Christmas was.
-how I need to lose weight before I buy a mother-of-the-bride dress.
-how I need to balance the check book and pay bills.
-prayers I'm praying for those I love.
-how sometimes life events turn out better than expected.
-how sometimes life events turn out worse than expected.
-how sometimes life events blindside you.
-how if I trusted God like I should, I wouldn't have issues getting to sleep.
-the attributes of God because I was having trouble falling asleep.
-how I needed to stop thinking about everything so I could fall asleep.
You get the idea. I don't remember the last thoughts I had before sleep eventually and, thankfully, came. The last time I looked at the clock, it was 1:15.
At 6 a.m., when I came into the kitchen this morning and Lou and I chatted about how we slept, I told him about my night. I also told him that today I was going to spend extended time calendaring and making lists of all that needed to happen over the next months so I could get a handle on things.
I then poured my coffee and sat down to meet with God. I opened my Bible Gateway tab like I always do and this was the Verse of the Day:
A lump rose in my throat and I thanked God.
He is faithful to help. He is faithful to his word.
One step at a time.
Coming to him.
Doing the next thing.
For His glory and my joy.
He will give me what I need.